Thursday, November 9, 2006
Wednesday, November 8, 2006
Dems, don't fuck this up.
How different is the Dem takeover compared to the Republican 1994 takeover? You've got women and black guys and muslims taking seats in the house as demanded by a pissed off America. Remember how not pissed off we were in 1994? Remember how pissed off the Republicans claimed we were and how we just weren't going to take what the nineties were doing to us anymore! They invented an enemy and provided themselves as the solution, and they've been dong it ever since, present a solution to a problem that doesn't exist (Corruption in the 1994 House & Senate, Whitewater, Filegate, Stampgate, Clinton, Iraq, a lack of support for the troops, homosexuality, "rampant" abortion, the liberal media, too much government, high-taxes, social security...) and decry their opposition for having no solution to the problems that don't exist. They were the adults, finally the adults were coming to power to solve this horrible decade in which all of us were living. The awful nineties, another myth brought to you by the people that brought you the war that is currently going well.
They took over with grandstanding, chest-thumping and written promises to make everything better, The Contract With America! An America that didn't know it was pissed off was informed on a daily basis that is was. An America that didn't know how much it hated it's neighbor was informed on a daily basis that it did, they don't believe in God and hate their country.
That's how they came in. The Democrats, of course, have made plenty of promises to make America better, they are campaigning after all. But, remember the nineties? Not bad, right? The extent to which you have to convince your electorate that things aren't going well in the country is a much shorter path in in 2006 than in 1994. They lied to get the power and have been lying ever since, what a pathetic movement. They did a really really bad job, a historically bad job, an even worse job if you compare how they've done to the promises they made in 1994, and an even worse job than that if you consider what 1994 was like compared to what they said it was like. If they hadn't made such a stink and claimed to be the saviors of America, then maybe we wouldn't be tossing them out the door without opening it. If they had been honest, the issues they felt were at issue could've been covered and, as is the purpose of government, a middle ground would've been found. But they couldn't have taken the house and Senate unless it became a crisis, because this was always about power, and not about the issues at all.
Along the way they had 100 hours of Senate testimony on the stamps Clinton was using on his Christmas cards and 4 hours on Abu Ghraib, they impeached a President with a 60% approval rating, and none of the people who were bringing accountabililty back to Washington have taken the blame for the leadup to Iraq, the plan for the aftermath and rebuilding of Iraq, the aftermath of Katrina, war profiteering, the 340 Trillion underestimation of the cost of war, the deficit, the last six budgets, the K street project, secret prisons, energy policy, and the outing of Valerie Plame. Nobody's responsible for any of that. It's a good thing because the Democrats are going to be probing to how all that went wrong, if anybody were responsible, that "anybody" should be nervous.
Boy, it was just a bunch of words wasn't it? Accountability, saviors, defending us against this enemy, the "Liberal." The irony is they've spent decades turning "liberal" into a word that liberals run from and then proceeded to spend twelve years themselves turning 'conservative" into a word they're running from. They are comic dopes of the highest degree.
Now that oversight has returned to Congress and it seems, the Senate, we'll get at least two years of them portraying themselves as the victim, decrying the mean Democrats for making people account for their mistakes and do time for their crime. They will claim often that the mean Democrats just "hate" the people they're revealing the criminal actions of. Oddly, they've become the liberals they decried, the perpetual victim minorities.
And if the Democrats did this much damage with all the lies they spread about what would happen to the country if the Dems took the lead. With all the dirty tricks they engaged in to suppress the vote. Then this is one hell of a mandate, the country would rather have Al-Qaeda-loving, child-murdering, child-raping, tax-raising, fags than the Republicans.
Oh, one last thing. Numerous vote-protection hotlines were set up to field complaints, because the Dems are mean that way. And to save America from this onslaught on our rights, some Conservative talk show asked it's listeners to jam their lines. Because...freedom? I personally don't understand these shock jocks in white collars they're like that guy who copied the guy who copied "Dice" Clay. Anyway, listen to this guy who called the line. This sums it all up. This guy is one pissed off conservative. But what is he pissed about. Even he doesn't know. I think that says it all.
They took over with grandstanding, chest-thumping and written promises to make everything better, The Contract With America! An America that didn't know it was pissed off was informed on a daily basis that is was. An America that didn't know how much it hated it's neighbor was informed on a daily basis that it did, they don't believe in God and hate their country.
That's how they came in. The Democrats, of course, have made plenty of promises to make America better, they are campaigning after all. But, remember the nineties? Not bad, right? The extent to which you have to convince your electorate that things aren't going well in the country is a much shorter path in in 2006 than in 1994. They lied to get the power and have been lying ever since, what a pathetic movement. They did a really really bad job, a historically bad job, an even worse job if you compare how they've done to the promises they made in 1994, and an even worse job than that if you consider what 1994 was like compared to what they said it was like. If they hadn't made such a stink and claimed to be the saviors of America, then maybe we wouldn't be tossing them out the door without opening it. If they had been honest, the issues they felt were at issue could've been covered and, as is the purpose of government, a middle ground would've been found. But they couldn't have taken the house and Senate unless it became a crisis, because this was always about power, and not about the issues at all.
Along the way they had 100 hours of Senate testimony on the stamps Clinton was using on his Christmas cards and 4 hours on Abu Ghraib, they impeached a President with a 60% approval rating, and none of the people who were bringing accountabililty back to Washington have taken the blame for the leadup to Iraq, the plan for the aftermath and rebuilding of Iraq, the aftermath of Katrina, war profiteering, the 340 Trillion underestimation of the cost of war, the deficit, the last six budgets, the K street project, secret prisons, energy policy, and the outing of Valerie Plame. Nobody's responsible for any of that. It's a good thing because the Democrats are going to be probing to how all that went wrong, if anybody were responsible, that "anybody" should be nervous.
Boy, it was just a bunch of words wasn't it? Accountability, saviors, defending us against this enemy, the "Liberal." The irony is they've spent decades turning "liberal" into a word that liberals run from and then proceeded to spend twelve years themselves turning 'conservative" into a word they're running from. They are comic dopes of the highest degree.
Now that oversight has returned to Congress and it seems, the Senate, we'll get at least two years of them portraying themselves as the victim, decrying the mean Democrats for making people account for their mistakes and do time for their crime. They will claim often that the mean Democrats just "hate" the people they're revealing the criminal actions of. Oddly, they've become the liberals they decried, the perpetual victim minorities.
And if the Democrats did this much damage with all the lies they spread about what would happen to the country if the Dems took the lead. With all the dirty tricks they engaged in to suppress the vote. Then this is one hell of a mandate, the country would rather have Al-Qaeda-loving, child-murdering, child-raping, tax-raising, fags than the Republicans.
Oh, one last thing. Numerous vote-protection hotlines were set up to field complaints, because the Dems are mean that way. And to save America from this onslaught on our rights, some Conservative talk show asked it's listeners to jam their lines. Because...freedom? I personally don't understand these shock jocks in white collars they're like that guy who copied the guy who copied "Dice" Clay. Anyway, listen to this guy who called the line. This sums it all up. This guy is one pissed off conservative. But what is he pissed about. Even he doesn't know. I think that says it all.
Tuesday, November 7, 2006
Sam & Jim say hi
Another pretty good day in L.A. Ordinarily there's nothing more depressing that signing up for a temp agency, however, there's nothing more exciting than signing up for a temp agency with the Hollywood sign as a backdrop to the woman interviewing you as she tells you that they mostly staff Fox and Paramount and that your writing and film crew pedigrees will come in handy. She gave me a word of warning that the studios don't pay much, usually $16 an hour (the most I ever made temping in Chicago was $12). She also told me that they mostly staff assistants to producers and that if they take a shine they'll take you in full time. Might be bullshit, but like everything in this town, I like believing it. Unfortunately I had to tell her I wouldn't be available until January because of another job, which makes me seem like less of a schlub.
Then I traveled entirely by rail (buses suck as much here as they do in Chicago) to gorgeous Pasadena to meet VIP's (Very Important Pasadenians)...Sam & Jim.
Who are Sam & Jim you ask? Well, my non-podcasting friend, they are the Car Talk of screenwriting on this lovely invention called Podcasting or democratized radio. I've been a lifelong talk radio fan long before the government passed a law that all talk had to be conservative, which is just shock jock radio all dessed up for church, "the 9/11 families are just people who want to be on tv?" gasp, you are very shocking, what's in the news Robin?
Podcasting was a lovely respite from the paucity of talk radio in my life a couple years ago. Instantly I found all kinds of filmmaking podcasts, final cut tip podcasts, Penn Jillette's show, Air America (godbless you), Fanboy Radio, CHUD, Creative Screenwriting, and...Sam & Jim Go To Hollywood. Sam & Jim are two Minnesota restauranteurs (and Macalestar grads) who decided one day after opening yet another smash hit restaurant in Minnesota that they weren't living the lives they'd always wanted to live. I know most of the people reading this are perfectly satisfied with where they are and have no unfulfilled dreams, but it really resonated with me (irony alert).
Sure, I had little to complain about, having accomplished my goal of making a sizeable dent in the comedy community in Chicago with the help of five people more talented than myself, but dammit I always wanted to be a filmmaker. Sure you can do all that in Chicago, but name somebody who has (really? are you sure John McNaughton never made a few trips to L.A prior to that? Maybe for financing?). I had to figure this industry out and Sam & Jim put a human face on this need. There they were, perfectly successful, but not perfectly happy. Can regular Joe's make it in Hollywood? No, of course not, go back to xeroxing for Anderson Consulting and stop asking stupid questions. BUT WAIT! Sam & Jim aren't the sons of Jerry Bruckheimer, they're just regular guys with few connections, let's listen in and see if regular Joe's can make it. That's the draw, Sam & Jim are you and I and the podcast chronicles their (your) move to L.A., the trials an tribulations as they get poor, poorer, get agents, get paid a piddling to write screenplays for movies that don't get produced, and eventually to the point where they sell a pilot and end up pitching Stephen King.
So a couple months ago while I was thinking about moving to Los Angeles (not a new thought) and I heard Sam & Jim put out the word that they were starting a new podcast that would be more Public Radio, more narrative, more...radio. They put out the call for writers and I promptly threw my hat in the ring.
So now, 29 days into this crazy adventure where did I find myself? On Sam's gorgeous back porch right outside his converted garage/office, sipping ice tea and having one very enjoyable industry conversation after another.
Sam picked me up at the train depot and drove me to his house. It is weird meeting a stranger who's voice and intonations you know very well. Sam has a particular way of delivering a joke and there I was in the car hearing this familiar delivery come from a stranger. It got stranger when, moments later, I'm standing in Sam's kitchen and in comes Jim, who had been playing video games all day as research (they're writing a video game). Now I'm hearing this duo of voices that were so familiar coming from guys I had only just met. Surreal is not the word, particularly when Jim laughed his very distinctive laugh.
Part of the charm of Sam & Jim's show is their personalities, they're just fun and funloving guys. Well, it's not an act, I'd just as easily hang out with Sam & Jim and talk about dirt as I would film. You should all spend some time with them if you get the chance.
We sat around for two or three hours on a gorgeous day at the foothills of some huge Pasadena mountains shoehorning the topic of democratized radio and Sam's grand and do-able plan to add real value to the medium in-between industry talk. They sent me home with an armful of reading: their radio pitch, the format pitch, the episode pitches, as well as two scripts that I already knew about from their podcast. I left them with a couple episodes of Schadenfreude and told them I'd help out in any way I could.
Pretty good day. Pre-tay...pre-tay...pretty good.
By the way: to get Sam & Jim's podcast, or any others just open up iTunes, go to the iTunes store and enter "Sam & Jim" in the search box, when it brings up "Sam & Jim Go To Hollywood", click "subscribe." It will now dowload the latest episode (a very good on e on Agents & Managers) and if you hit "podcasts", which is a few selections above the iTunes store you will see a listing of the one episode you have and 28 other episodes colored gray, click "get" on those to get the entire Sam & Jim oevre from restauranteurs to Steven King. Now enter Penn Jillette, Sam Seder, Air America, KCRW'S The Business, Fanboy Radio, Creative Screenwriting magazine, The CHUD Show, and Talkin' Funny, and you pretty much have my list.
Then I traveled entirely by rail (buses suck as much here as they do in Chicago) to gorgeous Pasadena to meet VIP's (Very Important Pasadenians)...Sam & Jim.
Who are Sam & Jim you ask? Well, my non-podcasting friend, they are the Car Talk of screenwriting on this lovely invention called Podcasting or democratized radio. I've been a lifelong talk radio fan long before the government passed a law that all talk had to be conservative, which is just shock jock radio all dessed up for church, "the 9/11 families are just people who want to be on tv?" gasp, you are very shocking, what's in the news Robin?
Podcasting was a lovely respite from the paucity of talk radio in my life a couple years ago. Instantly I found all kinds of filmmaking podcasts, final cut tip podcasts, Penn Jillette's show, Air America (godbless you), Fanboy Radio, CHUD, Creative Screenwriting, and...Sam & Jim Go To Hollywood. Sam & Jim are two Minnesota restauranteurs (and Macalestar grads) who decided one day after opening yet another smash hit restaurant in Minnesota that they weren't living the lives they'd always wanted to live. I know most of the people reading this are perfectly satisfied with where they are and have no unfulfilled dreams, but it really resonated with me (irony alert).
Sure, I had little to complain about, having accomplished my goal of making a sizeable dent in the comedy community in Chicago with the help of five people more talented than myself, but dammit I always wanted to be a filmmaker. Sure you can do all that in Chicago, but name somebody who has (really? are you sure John McNaughton never made a few trips to L.A prior to that? Maybe for financing?). I had to figure this industry out and Sam & Jim put a human face on this need. There they were, perfectly successful, but not perfectly happy. Can regular Joe's make it in Hollywood? No, of course not, go back to xeroxing for Anderson Consulting and stop asking stupid questions. BUT WAIT! Sam & Jim aren't the sons of Jerry Bruckheimer, they're just regular guys with few connections, let's listen in and see if regular Joe's can make it. That's the draw, Sam & Jim are you and I and the podcast chronicles their (your) move to L.A., the trials an tribulations as they get poor, poorer, get agents, get paid a piddling to write screenplays for movies that don't get produced, and eventually to the point where they sell a pilot and end up pitching Stephen King.
So a couple months ago while I was thinking about moving to Los Angeles (not a new thought) and I heard Sam & Jim put out the word that they were starting a new podcast that would be more Public Radio, more narrative, more...radio. They put out the call for writers and I promptly threw my hat in the ring.
So now, 29 days into this crazy adventure where did I find myself? On Sam's gorgeous back porch right outside his converted garage/office, sipping ice tea and having one very enjoyable industry conversation after another.
Sam picked me up at the train depot and drove me to his house. It is weird meeting a stranger who's voice and intonations you know very well. Sam has a particular way of delivering a joke and there I was in the car hearing this familiar delivery come from a stranger. It got stranger when, moments later, I'm standing in Sam's kitchen and in comes Jim, who had been playing video games all day as research (they're writing a video game). Now I'm hearing this duo of voices that were so familiar coming from guys I had only just met. Surreal is not the word, particularly when Jim laughed his very distinctive laugh.
Part of the charm of Sam & Jim's show is their personalities, they're just fun and funloving guys. Well, it's not an act, I'd just as easily hang out with Sam & Jim and talk about dirt as I would film. You should all spend some time with them if you get the chance.
We sat around for two or three hours on a gorgeous day at the foothills of some huge Pasadena mountains shoehorning the topic of democratized radio and Sam's grand and do-able plan to add real value to the medium in-between industry talk. They sent me home with an armful of reading: their radio pitch, the format pitch, the episode pitches, as well as two scripts that I already knew about from their podcast. I left them with a couple episodes of Schadenfreude and told them I'd help out in any way I could.
Pretty good day. Pre-tay...pre-tay...pretty good.
By the way: to get Sam & Jim's podcast, or any others just open up iTunes, go to the iTunes store and enter "Sam & Jim" in the search box, when it brings up "Sam & Jim Go To Hollywood", click "subscribe." It will now dowload the latest episode (a very good on e on Agents & Managers) and if you hit "podcasts", which is a few selections above the iTunes store you will see a listing of the one episode you have and 28 other episodes colored gray, click "get" on those to get the entire Sam & Jim oevre from restauranteurs to Steven King. Now enter Penn Jillette, Sam Seder, Air America, KCRW'S The Business, Fanboy Radio, Creative Screenwriting magazine, The CHUD Show, and Talkin' Funny, and you pretty much have my list.
Monday, November 6, 2006
Annnnnnd....time!
Stop the clock. Where are we? Two days shy of a month? (I can't believe it's only been a month since I moved here, it feels like a friggin' eternity, and an eternity is no amount of time to be crashing in your friends guest room). So 28 days, it took me the same amount of time for a zombie virus to clear out London to...get a job. Wahoo! Well, I'll be pulling a regular paycheck for two months, and then in January it's back to the fretting. The point is, I haven't fallen flat on my face, which many were predicting...well, I was predicting. Not that that possibility's not still there. If you want to work in the industry, you're going to have to wonder where your next job is coming from...alot. But super-extra-special thanks to Matt Lenhart for hooking me up with this gig. Two months is a lot of time to tell all the other people I've met here that I'm free to work in January. Right now I'm not completely aware of what I'm working on, but I will be a "Logger." Loggers watch the raw footage and write down the timecode of the in-points and out-points of each shot, and write down a description of the shot. This is all to help the proper editor, who I will endear myself to so that I get rehired as an assistant at $50 an hour.
Short-Haired Hiatus
I'm getting yelled at by Don Hall about the Short-Haired Chick Friday hiatus. Apologies. I will get one up this week and try to stay on track. Nobody has yelled at me about the hiatus in your Daily Moon Knight, which I'm a little upset with. It's Moon Knight, he's cool, almost as cool as Man-Thing, get a little outraged. Oh, and I'm aware I have some new readers I've been meeting here, so: Short-Haired Chick Friday is a tradition long-held on this weblog, every Friday i celebrate a new chick with short haIr with lots of pictures and lecherous text. I've actually received very warm praise from women with short hair who felt I vindicated their choice by celebrating it. I've also received warm praise from Don Hall, who wants to fuck everything.
Yesh-Menaish, My Name-A Borat
I laughed my ass off at Borat, it could easily be one of the funniest movies I've ever seen. The hype on it is damn close to correct. Can you belive they did an entire movie that just candid stunts? I love stunts, I wish they had worked on UCB's tv show. The whole movie is just stunts, I love it.
BUT THE BEST THING about Borat is the appearance by Todd Voorhies! Oh my god, the guys traveling in the trailer are such Todd's'. As soon as they came on the screen Bart and I looked at each other and say "Todd Voorhies." And then the son of a bitch turns around and he's WEARING A COCKS HAT!!!
Okay, I gotta get going, I'm signing up with another temp agency (an appointment I made before I was gainfully employed...for two months) and meeting with a VIP, a very important Pasadenian. Who is my mystery meeting? You'll have to tune in tomorrow.
Short-Haired Hiatus
I'm getting yelled at by Don Hall about the Short-Haired Chick Friday hiatus. Apologies. I will get one up this week and try to stay on track. Nobody has yelled at me about the hiatus in your Daily Moon Knight, which I'm a little upset with. It's Moon Knight, he's cool, almost as cool as Man-Thing, get a little outraged. Oh, and I'm aware I have some new readers I've been meeting here, so: Short-Haired Chick Friday is a tradition long-held on this weblog, every Friday i celebrate a new chick with short haIr with lots of pictures and lecherous text. I've actually received very warm praise from women with short hair who felt I vindicated their choice by celebrating it. I've also received warm praise from Don Hall, who wants to fuck everything.
Yesh-Menaish, My Name-A Borat
I laughed my ass off at Borat, it could easily be one of the funniest movies I've ever seen. The hype on it is damn close to correct. Can you belive they did an entire movie that just candid stunts? I love stunts, I wish they had worked on UCB's tv show. The whole movie is just stunts, I love it.
BUT THE BEST THING about Borat is the appearance by Todd Voorhies! Oh my god, the guys traveling in the trailer are such Todd's'. As soon as they came on the screen Bart and I looked at each other and say "Todd Voorhies." And then the son of a bitch turns around and he's WEARING A COCKS HAT!!!
Okay, I gotta get going, I'm signing up with another temp agency (an appointment I made before I was gainfully employed...for two months) and meeting with a VIP, a very important Pasadenian. Who is my mystery meeting? You'll have to tune in tomorrow.
Sunday, November 5, 2006
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