I was young and impressionable, it was a John Hughes movie. I had never fallen in love, but I was so desperate to. I was not a popular child, so having a girl like me was not likely, having one love me was kind of inconceiveable, and having a girl who looked like Mary Stuart Masterson like me? Well that's just crazy Science Fiction.
Nastassja Kinski may have made me realize I liked short hair on chicks, but Mary Stuart Masterston sealed the deal. Because unlike the supervictim Nastassja in Cat People, Mary Stuart Masterson was a confident, boyish, ballsy drummer chick. Fuck you, this is who I am. This was no Barbie Doll, it was so cool to see a woman presented that way. It was a rare type of woman in pop culture, it was sexy.
I completely fell in love with her. That short hair, all those boyish traits, she was more than a hot chick in jeans, she was a pal, a girl you could really just hang out with. My heart melted. That's a weird phrase, heart melting, yet I know that feeling when you fall in love instantly and all the blood flushes from your face and goes into your chest and then your heart start beating real fast because you didn't realize until this moment that someone could be that beautiful. Melty, I suppose.
Anyway. And then Eric Stoltz would blow her off for the fake hot chick that you can get anytime, you'd pass up the unique boyish pal drummer gal for a chick you could throw a dart at a Cheetah Gym and find. COME ON! Mary-Elizabeth - OVER HERE! I'll date you!!! OVER HERE!! I know I'm just a 13 year old nerd in Lewisburg Ohio with crisis level heating problems, but just give me a chance!!!
I know it all worked out for the best, but the idea that for a moment he wouldn't see the quality of this babe, I still don't like Eric Stoltz. Fuck Eric Stoltz, Mask sucks too. This is what blue feels like? This is what my boot up your Mary-Elizabeth denying ass feels like. Your ugly and Cher dresses you funny. Go be in Anaconda.
She's so damn cute. It hurts.
No comments:
Post a Comment