Is Your Boss Around? Seriously. Seriously. Seriously. Is he? Because it' Short-Haired Chick Friday!!

Seriously?


I'm not fucking around.


You think I'm fucking with you?


I am not fucking with you?





Oh, do I have your attention now? Yeah. it's the middle ass by the way.

The ass belongs to one Michelle L'Amour, according to her very sexy website she has "The Ass That Goes Pow!", and uh, it kinda does.

I saw Michelle a long time ago and damn, she's the real deal, a sexual powerhouse. She'll mesmerize you. I didn't know what happened when the lights came up.



Burlesque is pretty powerful. It's amazing all these years later it still gets a lot of guys' boats runnin'. In general it's not my thing, but I have complete respect for the art form. I love how it rides the line of enjoyment of the theatrical and historical exhibition of sex and just being boner time. It's Old School Fred Flintstone, Ralph Cramden Moose Lodge sexiness.



I came back across Michelle because some guy in my office knowing my short-haired chick obsession said "You wanna see sexy, go to The Lavender Cabaret. It's disturbing that point where you know someone you work with way too well because you know who he'd fuck. Ew. Anyway.



Michelle is masterful at the form, the top. She's won contests and is just damn good at Burlesque. I love the name, Michelle L'Amour, such a fantasy name. The way the L's run together, how French it sounds, all fancy and French Maid-ish. I think before Swedish became the standard bearer of sexuality in America it was French. The pre-70's "Swede." I think when burlesque shows were all the rage, French was THE nationality.



This is before we formed out national security policy around hating them. ...does anything make our government look more frat boy than that? Fucking Todd Voorhies is our President. If you don't want to bomb Iraq you're French. Tag! Haha! Burn! Don't go to sleep or I'll write on your forehead.

Stoob: You're fuckin' French dude.
Todd: No I'm not.
Stoob: Do you want to bomb Iraq?
Todd: Well, fuckin', I don't know, did they...
Stoob: You're fuckin' French!
Todd: Am not, okay, let's bomb so we're like each other.
Stoob: You belong Todd!
Todd: Yes! I belong, my brain is now giving you the endorphine for pleasure derived from belonging.
Stoob: Hey, how you votin' on prop 12, you think gays should be allowed to teach?
Todd: Well, sure.
Stoob: FAG!
Todd: Am not!
Stoob: Let's go jack each other off, you know, for the joke!
Todd: Okay.

Okay, don't know how I got there, but as I tell my writing class, sometimes it's just best to let it ride itself out.

Where were we.



Oh yeah.

I think the fact that you can't view this with your boss around shows the power that Burlesque still has. It's not that they're naked, it's that the Burlesque performers of the past have so ingrained in your head what sexy is, that a glance at these images is stronger than if she were just Shannyn Sossamon naked. Oddly it's something you can't look at that was and still is an acceptable amount of nudity.





Way to go John, fuck the one on the right! The ONE ON THE RIGHT! Wait, he's married. THE ONE ON THE RIGHT!

Years ago I read Albert Goldman'sLadies and Gentlemen, Lenny Bruce! Great book, if a little built up and fantasized. Lenny got his start as a host at Burlesque shows. That's the only thing I feel Burlesque shows are missing.



They're not dirty enough. Every time I've seen new Burlesque it always falls short only because of the host, they seem to cast these hosts more out of Cabaret than a real Burlesque show, someday I'd like to see an emulation of a divey Burlesque instead of one of the fancy fancy places.

If you've made it this far obviously you work in a loose environment or the boss is on vacation.


But take an extra look around before you check out this...






And definitely.





Before you check out.


This.



Oh my CHRIST! Just stop it, you're just bad. Bad! You need a spanking...oh, sorry, where are my manners.

Okay, I'm fine.



Oh shit, my manners are fucked.



Last one!



Last one! BEST ONE!



Last one! BEST ONE!




Wow.

So what are you all doing this weekend?



Hm. Improv Fest...the Ass That Goes Pow!, Mad TV writers show...garters. So torn. So very very torn.

Wait! I forgot one. ...the best one?



Otisburg has just gone to hell. I'm a porn blog now. Next week, actual fucking. The hell with it.