Short-Haired Chick Friday: Goddess Edition

You can't beat a classic. This would be the girl that started it all. Nastassja Kinski. The girl who carried the torch from Audrey Hepburn to Audrey Tatou in terms of cute pixie-cut. When I saw Cat People in 82 I just thought she was so beautiful. I mean look at that damn face! Painfully beautiful.



There's something so damn alluring about her in Cat People, it ruins the movie, it feels like everyone else should be under her spell instead of the Clockwork Orange guy.



I still have this daydream where I meet Nastassja and we totally hit it off and we have one great night of passion. I remember reading in the book "Easy Riders, Raging Bulls" that that fat hack Paul Schrader had sex with her during the shooting of Cat People. I was really pissed. Still am. Go direct Skeet Ulrich in "Touch" you has-been!



Sigh.

I had the dream again, the one where I blow Pat Fitzgerald

Pat...you, you've earned it.

Awesome stuff going on. Pat Fitzgerad is widening the scope of his investigation. SWEET! Wider...wider, yeahh, that's where I like it. This has been the great thing about this case all along, it's bigger than whether her identity was marked secret or not you talking point dumbshits.

Sure, having someone in your administration out a CIA agent is a big fucking deal, having that outed CIA agent be a 20 year vet on WMD detail is a bigger deal, having her outed in order to silence a critic of the administration who claimed the administration was overexaggerating the CIA information on WMD's is a huge fuckup. Oh, and the WMD war in Iraq ain't goin' so well, it'd be a shame if it had been unneccesary.

This is where Fitzgerald is going now, and thanks to the events surrounding the case it's not a stretch. Considering Bush's abuses of office, going after them for outing a CIA agent seems like going after Capone for tax evasion, so I'm just so happy that the offense that got a Grand Jury called on their assees leads to so many other great questions indicative of EVERYTHING wrong about the administration. From media manipulation to war manipulation to the 16 words to secrecy to halliburton to rove to teh conservative movement it all really could crumble because of Valarie Wilson.

Oh, and Bush is debating himself again, redifining the War On Terror as a War On Extremism. Which I agree with, only a bunch of Cold War idiots would've thought this ideological war could be fought like Normandy was. Uh, things have changed "bit" since then, but thanks for trying. I guess there's not enough no-bid contracts involved in an intelligence war, which I'd gladly spend 80billion on.

The only problem I have with Bush's redefinition is this it's what JOHN KERRY SAID WE SHOULD BE DOING!!!! And then Rove sent out talking points about how John Kerry's a fucking asshole and how dare he and every Republican had the same opinion with the same phrasing and everyone bought it and John Kerry was a fucking dick for suggesting such a thing and now Bush got this great new idea that Republicans will love. Sigh. Can I shoot myself yet? Oh, wait, what's that Pat Fitzgerald? I have something to live for? Terrific. See, he's saving lives too!

Orwell Rolls His Eyes

I wonder how many Bush voters would even GET an Orwell reference?

Here's a great blurb from thinkprogress.org

10/5/01: Bush Pulls Security Clearances From 92 Senators
“We can’t have leaks of classified information. It’s not in our nation’s interest.” - President George W. Bush, 10/9/01

President Bush’s defiant statement came in the immediate weeks following 9/11, as the administration clamped down on the information it provided to Congress. President Bush issued an order limiting access to classified intelligence only to 8 members of Congress — the Speaker of the House, House Minority Leader, Senate Majority Leader, Senate Minority Leader, and chairmen and ranking members of the House and Senate intelligence committees.

What precipitated this course of action?

Gannett News Service reported on 10/1/01 that Bush was restricting information because, “The Washington Post reported last week that various lawmakers had been told there would be more terrorist attacks if the United States retaliated.”

Here’s what the Washington Post reported:

Asked whether more terrorist attacks are inevitable if the United States retaliates, [Sen. Richard] Shelby said, “You can bet on that.” … U.S. intelligence officials have told members of Congress there is a high probability that terrorists associated with Osama bin Laden will try to launch another major attack on U.S. targets here or abroad. [Washington Post, 10/6/01]

So at this slightest whiff of evidence that information was being leaked, President Bush pulled classified intelligence access for 92 senators. There was no ongoing criminal investigation nor was there evidence that all the members who had their access limited had leaked information. And now he refuses to hold Karl Rove and Scooter Libby to anywhere near the same standard, despite confirmation of their involvement in the leak of an undercover CIA agent’s identity.

My comments: Aside from the obvious double standard, it's interesting to look back at some Bush administration actions, the little actions they made that seemed to be for national security (you could've called a bill requiring all Americans to eat only dogshit on wednesdays a National Security Bill and passed it on 9/12) knowing now why they did it. This move was preparing to hide the National Intelligence Estimate on the Iraqi threat. A National Intelligence Estimate is required ot assess the threat of another country prior to war, PARTICULARLY a pre-emptive one. In case you didn't know, Bush wanted to go to war saying that the intelligence pointed to an imminent threat, but the Senate wouldn't authorize without and NIE, Bush did an NIE, and then told the Senate it was classified but corrorated their earlier fears, pushed further the Bush Admin was forced to make public a "summary" of the NIE which was highly cooked and left out all dissenting remarks from the NIE. If one were to declassify the NIE and compare it to the cooked summary which was presented to the world, the administation would be more fucked than Tori Welles.

I'm curious how many Repulicans vs. Democrats had their security clearances revoked?

Now they classify 125 Documents a minute. Why? for national security you fucking terrorist fuck, stop asking so many questions and obey or you'll get killed, how would you like that? Getting killed? That's what I thought, now if you'll excuse me and my administration, our little answer to your little why question has cost us valuable classifying time.

But if you asked any of the Republican slave Conservative Christian robot creature beasts none of this is suspicious and it's all because Bush cares about the safety of poor Ohioans SO much. The Bush Administartion is just one big set of plush open arms that just cares night and day about national security, and killing ragheads...oh shit, did I type that, could we have that last sentence classified. Great. There, never happened. Sleep, you sleep now, sleeeep now, sleeeeeeeeeeep.

Annoying Habits I'd LIke To Make a Habit of Just To Be A Prick

1. Saying "You know, like in the movie" after practically any sentence.
2. Demanding people call me a new name every few weeks, not responding to the old one.
3. Making one of the names "delicious new taste"
4. Bursting into the "Spin Me Right Round Baby" at random.
5. Describing shits I've taken.

The V For Vendetta Trailer Has Hit!

If you haven't seen the V For Vendetta Trailer you're in for a treat.



Also a clip of the upcoming Comic Book adaptation of Ghost Rider has surfaced, looks like it'll be better than Man-Thing. I'm just happy they made a moie about Ghost Rider of all subjects. I can tell you my review already - "Hey, it's a Ghost Rider Movie.

Also did you know Fantastic Four made 200 million fucking dollars overseas. It's making like Spider-Man money. And it sucks! But hey, it's a Fantastic Four movie.

Has Anyone Mentioned The Heat?

I don't know if anyone's talked about the heat yet, so I thought I'd take the opportunity to say it's hot out. I find that too little in society today do people discuss the weather, but this subject of conversation is often glossed over in the wake of great heat. But it's hot. Actually hot. I found it odd a month ago when it actually got hot for the first time in this very cool summer that people were complaining. It wasn't that hot, but people are always so excited to talk about how hot it is that they blew their load a month ago complaining about the heat because it was upper 70's. WBEZ was so excited to get their pre-packaged story on the heat-wave out that they did it like a month ago. "Surviving the heat? Here's some some tips on light-loose clothing, fluids, and where not to leave your dog." A month ago. Last night I had a soda go warm. Not unusual except that it felt like it had been left on the stove. That's really going warm. When I write I sit in the front room of my apartment I get a nice cross breeze through the many windows, as I wrote the cross breeze got warmer and warmer and warmer until I felt like I was by a blow-dryer. It's weird to have a breeze be so caustically anti-me. Breeze's are usually friendly in some way. Also I'd like to talk to Edgewater about the paucity of hot women on their beaches, where do I file that? Anybody? Anyway, just thought I'd mention the heat, now that it's worth mentioning. Hey, has anybody seen this movie Pulp Fiction?

Is there anything to say about Karl Rove that hasn't been said?

Oh I got something that hasn't been said. "Gee, he doesn't LOOK like a Republican."

Short-Haired Chick Friday

Say what you will about Demi and her stupid boytoy, no I mean it, say what you will, I'll give you a few seconds... ... ... ... That's how I feel too, but nobody was cuter than short-haired Ghost-era Demi Moore. So cute. I miss Ghost-Era Demi Moore, so long before G.I. Jane and that virtual reality reverse-sexism Michael Douglas Michael Creighton movie and Ashton Kutcher took all the fun out of loving her. If you feel the same way say it with me, Ditto.

If I make them laugh along the way, sue me. And I don’t do it so they turn round and go ‘Thank you David for the opportunity, thank you for the wisdom

You heard it here first, unless you go to Aint-It-Cool a lot.

Ricky Gervais’ EXTRAS
Arrives in Britain!!

In a few short hours, BBC2 televises the first episode of “Extras,” the new showbiz sitcom from “The Office” creators Stephen Merchant and Ricky Gervais. It airs in the states on HBO in September, presumably months after everyone downloads it on bittorrent.

It’s about an aspiring actor named Andy Millman who makes a living as a film extra because Millman’s agent of five years has yet to land him a speaking part. In the opener, Ben Stiller, director of “The Cable Guy” and “Zoolander,” is helming a film set in war-torn Central Europe.

The Hollywood Reporter says:
… Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant, the creative talent behind cult comedy hit "The Office," have come up with another winner in their brilliant new six-part series "Extras." Incisive, fearless and laugh-out-loud funny, "Extras" will appeal to anyone who liked "The Larry Sanders Show" and "Curb Your Enthusiasm." Fans of "The Office" will surely embrace Gervais' new character, Andy Millman, who is far from being David Brent but is just as needy and driven in his own way and given to hilariously wince-making utterances. … The comedy is devastating in its insider's grasp of the egos and power structure of filmmaking. …

Here’s a review just sent in by someone identifying himself as “Rich”:
Just seen the first episode of Extras, screening tonight on BBC2 at 9pm, and in the US on HBO in September.
For those expecting another "The Office", it's not that, but there are elements you'll recognise.
"Extras" is the new series by The Office writers Stephen Marchant and Ricky Gervais and stars Gervais as an "extra" in the British TV and movioe business. Constantly looking for work, to increasehis role, to get on screen and grab those all important lines.

Concurrent with both series is the idea of people being selfish, getting caught out in their selfishness and embarrassed by it, and trying to excuse it. And in the cut thrust world of acting, this is intensivied.
The first episode sees Ben Stiller playing himself, directing a movie set in war torn eastern Europe. The topic of the movie is juxtaposed with the flippant attitiudes of its participants, which culminates with a showdown between Stiller and some of the extras, exposing him as a fragile egotistical freak - "Meet The Fockers is the number one film in India today!" and defines Gervais' character far from the bumbling idiot of The Office, but an intelligent with. "David Brent" was a fool who didn't know his limititations. "Andy" doesn't have that excuse, he's fully aware of his situation and is incredibly frustrated by that.
The script is sharper, the direction no longer hampered by the fly-on-the-wall docudrama style, and the A-list stars seem willing to make greater fools of themselves than they did on Larry Sanders and Curb Your Enthusiasm.
And the second episode's portrayal of Ross Kemp as an actor who believes his own hype about being a hard man, is fingers-over-the-eyes painful...

Summer hit.

Sweet new Superman Picture

routhsupesnew, originally uploaded by PinthGarnell.

They released a very sweet new picture of Brendan Routh as Superman so I thought I'd do a quick superhero post. By the way, mark my words, on the record, from everything I've heard and read so far about Superman Returns, I state that Superrman Returns will be not only a great movie, and a great superhero movie, but one of the best movies any of us have ever seen. 800 mil worldwide.

Saw Batman again, God that film rocks.

Saw Fantastic Four again just to make sure it was as bad as I thought.

It is. I'll give my usual caveat for all bad superhero movies: "But hey, it's a Fantastic Four movie."

Non-Tales from the Non-Trenches pt. 1: : How I Haven't Got Into Hollywood Yet

PACKADAY is back from SanFran, went to a summit on independent film finance, ended up knowing more than a lot of the guys there. Does not surprise me, when you live in Chicago and want to make it in the movie business you have to work harder and know more than you would in L.A. Chicago people get precious few shots, we want to make them count. Either that or he's full of shit, propping up his ego with claims of vast industry knowledge surpassing that of even the most seasoned pro. Knowing Packaday, that could be an option. Bottom line a few connections were made. But I had no idea how great those connections were until I looked them up. One of the writer's Packaday met was peddling his script, Catchy Idea With Twist Ending. It not only sounded catchy but sounded like a perfect match for Tits & Priests, which Diablito and myself had written as the first screenplay for Packaday's new production company, Marketable Films, based on the book by Known Entity. In a nice twist of fate, the writer of Catchy Idea had also tried to buy the rights to Tits & Priests a while back. Packaday wants to pitch some people he met on financing the two projects together for $4mil, it would be a nice pairing. Meanwhile, knowing that Tits & Priests is going to be hitting some hands soon, I am rewriting. Over the last year all of the additions to the script have been additions like obvious bandaids put on the surface and I'm trying to integrate everything. So I do some research on the writer of Catchy Idea to find out that he worked on some of my favorite exploitation films, including Zarkorr: The Invader. Awesome! AND he's worked for a legend, a true legend in the exploitation industry, the man who created Psychos In Love, Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death, Tourist Trap, Zone Troopers, Parasite, Troll, Ghoulies, Robot Jox! and...wait for it, wait for it FUCKING Metalstorm: The Destruction of Jared Syn. Oh and 200 other films all from a company he started during the glorious video boom of the early 80's. I don't know if there's any creator who's work I was surprised to find I knew like I knew this guys. Great stuff. Does it mean anything? No. Does it mean Tits & Priests will be done anytime soon? No. Does it mean the $4mil development deal is a go? No. But Metalstorm, that just pleases me like nothing else. And this is probably why I'll make it in the industry. Because unlike a lot of people I've met and work for, I just simply want to make movies out of love.

From The New York Times

WASHINGTON, July 18 - President Bush changed his stance today on his close adviser Karl Rove, stopping well short of promising that anyone in his administration who helped to unmask a C.I.A. officer would be fired.

"If someone committed a crime, they will no longer work in my administration," Mr. Bush said in response to a question, after declaring, "I don't know all the facts; I want to know all the facts."

For months, Mr. Bush and his spokesmen have said that anyone involved in the disclosure of the C.I.A. officer's identity would be dismissed. The president's apparent raising of the bar for dismissal today, to specific criminal conduct, comes amid mounting evidence that, at the very least, Mr. Rove provided backhanded confirmation of the C.I.A. officer's identity.

What I'm Doing Right Now

I'm calling business professionals and asking them if they'd like to invest in an independent film. That's what I do for a living. It's an amazing combination of glamorous and completely not. While the last film I raised capital for is being edited in New York as I speak and will be in theatres this fall and will probably do well, I am getting hung up on by secretaries. How do you convey to a secretary that you're not bullshitting? We actually do make movies, with people you'd know in them. Until the movie's out we are nobody and nobody cares. But that's the seventh ring of hell aspect to this job, even when it comes out and I'm still here, still trying to get people to take me seriously, the still won't. If it turns out to be Titanic when it's released this fall, I'll still have to coerce Judy the secretary, with as many small words as possible that her boss, with the liquid cash, may want to talk to me. Which ring of hell was it that they push the boulder up the hill, let it roll back down and then roll it up again? Yeah, that's the level of hell you get into when you actually get a lawyer on the phone. You pitch yourself, the company, the new movie, the old movie, and he thinks your joking. If you convince him to take a look at the investment. There is a 60% chance that that is the last time you will talk to him, you call every day, leave messages, and after a couple months, get the hint and give up. Of the other 40% you send info to, 5% of them will let you pitch them in a follow up call and ask questions and let you try to sell them. 4% will say no, 1% wil say yes, and half those that say yes will ever send their check. Welcome to indy film. Gotta go, the boulder just rolled back down the hill.

Politics Corner, Monday Edition

So Rove didn't do it, kinda, but thank you anyway to all the Democrats who came out and called for Rove's resignation, bolstering the Republican's claim that this was partisan politics. I know guys, it's hard to play their game, particularly when you're not that good at it. You all look really sad when you try and play the game they invented. Rove

Anyway, the good new is, this isn't about Rove. The big question that still remains is why, why oh why oh why oh why was is so urgent, SO IMPORTANT that they discredit Joe Wilson's claim that the world is, in fact, round. What a good administration, so concerned about the press that they didn't want them to print something false. Anyone buying this? About 40% of the country, the one's who jump really far into bed because they're afraid a liberal might be under there and grab their ankles. Yes, the administration read Wilson's Op Ed article stating the roundness of the earth, in conflict with their claims that it was flat and wanted to make sure that the press didn't believe him. Hey, what if he was a liar? So concerned was the administration that the press might have an embarrassment that they sidestepped all the usual outlets of disseminating information and had the Chief-Of-Staff of the Vice President and Whatever Rove's Bullshit Title Is call the press personally to make sure the press didn't print something that might be wrong. That's so nice of them. Lucky for the administration the world IS flat or their fervor over disproving it would be very embarrassi...oh wait.

Short-Haired Dick Friday

dick, originally uploaded by PinthGarnell.

Most people calling for Rove's resignation have about as much "real" interest in the intricacies of CIA identity security procedure as Republicans do "real" interest in Joe Wilson's lack of credibility, but when will the Republicans statement of this being party politics weaken? They use that every time someone says anything about them. How can anyone buy that that's an honest defense, how can the party that impeached Clinton say "party politics" about people getting testy about their decisions which have killed Americans. "Party politics" is not a good defense, certainly not from those who invented it. I can't believe there are people out there that think that that's a damn good argument because they have to agree with the party line. Why can't you have your own opinion? Why do you have the party line and "talking points" which are not your actual opinion, but the opinion of someone who makes more than you and makes that by having you strengthen their numbers, you idiot, by speaking their talking points! Disagree with them just once, stregthen your own personal party. Why would anyone trust anyone that seeks to form their opinion for them.

So, let me get this straight, all accusations of wrongdoing, no matter how accurate, if leveled at a Republican are only done so out of partisanship? Who fucking buys the opinon of someone who says they're always right? So they're instantly exonerated in all cases? Why would anyone give them that power? Why would anyone with honest intentions need such a power? And when will people stop seeing their positions as that of strength?

I vote to ban political parties. Can anyone defend why we HAVE to have them? Why anyone on Fox News or the Senate floor or the White House needs an (R) or (D) after their name. How about the Yea Party and the Nay party. On every issue you are either in favor of it, or against it. That's your party line. Do you really think there are no pro-gun, pro-death penalty, or Christian Democrats? The Republicans would tell you none of these exist, because if they did, it would weaken their stupid party. Man, fuck the party system.

I'd like someone to give me a good argument for the organizing principal of the parties. If there were none how quickly would the country go to hell. My thought is, slower.

Why do Republicans have talking points? Why should that be allowed? Shouldn't that be suspect? Why do we allow any section of our government to have a mnaifesto which literally defines a with us or against us policy. Anarchists have manifesto's, Socialists have manifesto's, communists have manifesto's, why do we take it in stride when a section of our government does the same thing? Why do we trust anyone without their own mind to make up on this issue, but rather agree with the talking points and make THAT their opinion. That sincerely upsets me. Why can't a case for Iraq be layed out and, based on a discussion between those in favor and those opposed (yay or nay party), decide whether it makes sense or not, how can everyone on one side "magically" automatically agree on a topic that also fits the guidelines of their party affiliation? I don't trust those sort of antics in a representative government for a second and you should be ashamed of yourself if you do.

There's simply no way to believe that someone who says "with us or against us" is capable of making his case without that crutch and I can't trust anyone who does. Try to convince me without it if you want my trust. Dicks.

Short-Haired Chick Friday!

Hello beautiful!, originally uploaded by PinthGarnell.

It would, of course, only be a matter of time before the girl from the Transporter 2 trailer ended up here. Luc Besson, you are a genius, you need an assassin in your movie, do you pick some big, ugly imposing dude like every other action director? No, you pull a hot thin supermodel (Kate Nauta) from the pile you keep by your bed, chop her hair, put her in lingerie and have her try and kill the Transporter dressed only in lingerie and two automatic pistols. And if that isn't a genius enough move, make sure there's a fire so that lots of water stream down onto that Lingerie during the firefight.

Good call.

Talking Points!

I love that no matter how bad the Republican in question may be, no matter how bad they've fucked up no Republican is allowed to disagree, and to make sure that they all sound like robots talking lockstep, the Republicans issue talking points, basically telling all people in government or media exactly what their opinon should be. Don't you trust them already? I thought the talking points on Rove were hilarious in that they would SLAY a Democrat if they dared defend their position with this much spin, but for the Republican this is all noble and good and honest and they really love poor people and Jesus. While the refutation of the talking points might be easy (um, yeah, I'm sure Joe Wilson would back Kerry after you fucked with him) but I found this piece by piece refutationto be fascinating. Did you know that Rove was fired by Bush Sr. for leaking in 1992? I like George H.W. more and more every day, especially that part where he said in his book "Had we gone the invasion route, the United States could conceivably still be an occupying power in a bitterly hostile land."

Are the RyKrisp Stockholders Happy?

The Cracker Bowl!, originally uploaded by PinthGarnell.

I was in a diner the other day, the kind with a bar and cubicle-like dividers between booths. The good kind of diner. The kind with lifer waitresses. The kind with the cracker bowl. You know you're in a good diner when they bring the cracker bowl. But here's my question, are the RyKrisp stockholders happy? The RyKrisp corporation, to my knowledge makes one product, and is damn good at it, but are the stockholders okay with that? Did they expect more out of RyKrisp beyond that one good idea. In a day and age when Gatorade has expanded from green and orange flavored (1970 - 2000), to 6,000 flavors including hot dog (2000 - 2005), might the RyKrisp stockholders wonder if they've backed a bunch of slackers. Sure RyKrisp and it's fellow industrial diner giants Turnbull Garlic Rounds

and Kako Saltines

have done well in their small market, but I just wonder could they be more?

Tonight we record our last episode

While it won't air for weeks, tonight we have our final recording session on our last episode, and we are in prime form. I've never seen the crew of Schadenfreude laugh more and have more fun with the show. It's like a pressure has been relieved. We shouldn't take ourselves so seriously more often. You may have noticed, and will notice as we near in on Episode 61* that we have been bending the medium quite a bit, from the full on parody of Twin Peaks to a single conversation spanning 30 minutes, as we finish up we'll get one more good old fashioned sketch-type show "1947 W. Argyle" and then we'll get a full narrative two-parter (another new idea for the show from the house of Schad), and then I think you'll really enjoy episode 61*. The amazing thing about 61* is that it's special, it's a last episode, but the amazing thing was, it was written LONG before we were cancelled, as a joke on the idea of being cancelled. Be sure to tune in, it's pretty special, we're having a great time recording it and tonight we look out over Lake Michigan from our Navy Pier balcony for the last time. I'm very excited about the future and so happy to see the Schad crew happy again. Not happy because we lost the show, but relieved that this incredibly hard work is over for the moment. In September we go away to write again, originally we were going to be writing 15 Episodes, now we will be writing "only" three things. An album, A TV Show, and a stage show. Very very excited.

The Greatest Spectator Sport Ever!

If you are missing it, the impeachment is beginning. It wouldn't surprise me if you are missing it, because the media is making sure you are. The revelation that Karl Rove blew the cover of a CIA agent operating in Saudi Arabia as revenge for her husband's suggestion that the Administration was lying about WMD's was page 26 news in the Sun-Times today. Let me repeat that, the closest confidante to the President (son of the former head of the CIA) was revealed to have committed a High Crime for political motive. And it was page 26 news a week after it was revealed. Remember when scary scary Whitewater was page 1 news? Scary scary Whitewater that was going to reach up from under the bed and getcha! in the middle of the night. Page 1 news. Clinton's affairs, page one news. Remember Clinton's expensive haircuts? How dare he. I'm curious how much Halliburton charges us for haircutting of the troops, reeeeeeal curious. Somehow, despite the fact that Bush's Father is on record saying such a crime should be punishable by life imprisonment, and the fact that Bush has said on record that whoever is responsible for the leak should be punished to the highest extent, not to mention the fact that the leak was revenge for Joe Wilson's CORRECT claim about the Administrations WMD claims, this is page 26 news. Fucking liberal media. Who can blame them, the Adminstration pays a lot of people a lot of money to monitor what is said about them and their war and when a paper says "Bush might be doing something wrong" they get calls telling them they're too liberal. Despite the presses attempts to crush the story of the century this particular crime might stick and get them the impeachment they so richly deserve. Check out Scott McClellan as he
ducks and dodges. It reads like the script for Strangelove.

Now imagine. Just imagine, all this happening under Clinton, with Hilary instead of Rove. Holee Shit.

Short-Haired Chick Friday

Domino Casual, originally uploaded by PinthGarnell.

The less said about Keira Knightley the less I sound creepy. She's hot, she's in a Tony Scott movie called Domino, she has short hair and dresses like a boy. End of line.

Tomorrow You're Fired

When we started the radio show Two and a half years ago we knew we might not have much time. We knew it might only be these Thirty Episodes, we knew it might not bring fame and fortune and money and riches, but we did know it would bring us great training, and a great opportunity to find a bigger audience audience than Friday nights at the Heartland in Roger's Park. We made a sign that hangs in the office to this day that says "Tomorrow, You're Fired." In other words, get out of this what you can while you can. Our first contract was for Thirty episodes or Fifteen hours of content or as much comedy as we had written in the previous five years combined. Daunting. And we were in completely new territory, so we'd have to learn how to write this much content and produce this much content on-the-job, while holding down dayjobs. It wasn't easy. Nor was Season Two. I doubt anyone reading this has listened to every episode...because I haven't. But I'll tell you what you'd have heard if you had, six to ten amateurs really come into their own. You can see learning in the work, Episode 18 is as far as you could get form Episode 1, 30 is light-years from 18, 32 is an amazing advance beyond 30 and the ten episodes have been some of the greatest advancements we've made with severe and surprising right and left turns in format from a single half-hour conversation (54) to a full-on Mad Magazine Parody of Twin Peaks (55). Along the way we made breakthroughs in writing that I'm positive we would've claimed impossible two and a half years ago.

And Tomorrow, You're Fired.

This was the best thing that could've happened to us. Why waste another year of learning far less and THEN get cancelled. We were blessed with the opportunity to "get good or get out" in the entertainment industry where you have to be good or be thrown out the door. And now, we are ready. Ready to tackle other mediums with renewed confidence that we are really fucking good at this. 30 fully produced hours of entertainment. Who could be upset at that. Thank you WBEZ for allowing a bunch of idiots who don't know enough to know when they're in over their head to roll with the punches and learn more than we could've in ten years at our previous pace. No challenge seems daunting now, so we're cooking up all kinds of them for us now and I know the next year will be far better with this freedom than with the standard and familiar constraints.

The website will continue to be filled with original content, look for us onstage doing staged versions of some of our favorite episodes this fall. Thank you all for listening and supporting us, because we're all about you.

You Are Not Cool

My Sister & Bruce Campbell, originally uploaded by PinthGarnell.

You might think you are cool. But you're not. Don't worry, I have evidence. Look at the picture above this text. You will note two things, my sister Jessie and Bruce Campbell. Bruce Campbell is cool enough to have made movies with Sam Raimi while growing up in Michigan, cool enough to have raised financing independently with Sam and Robert Tapert to make Evil Dead, which was cool enough to make a lot of money for very little budget thus justifying two sequels, one of which, Army of Darkness, is cooler than most other movies combined and includes some of the coolest dialogue delivered by the very cool Bruce Campbell. "You ain't leading nothing but Jack and shit, and Jack just left town." And my sister, she's cool enough at her young age to recognize cool when she sees it. That's my sister and Bruce Campbell. That is just damn cool. Cooler than you.

Klaatu, Barada,...necktie, nectarine, definitely an N word.

Flame on!

Live action!, originally uploaded by PinthGarnell.

Well, I wouldn't be a proper nerd without saying that, just as with Batman Begins, I am very excited to see Fantastic Four. I just get excited at the idea that such a thing exists. The very idea that a realistic treatment would be given to these wild stories I loved as a kid and that someone would try and convince an audience through the most realistic art medium that a man can catch on fire or turn invisible, or be turned into a pile of rocks. I've seen Spider-Man many times and it still astounds me that it exists, a real-life version of the Spider-Man story (not to mention two of them). Cool. So cool. I can tell already that the geek community is so excited to be unimpressed when they see this, but I never am. No matter how bad The Fantastic Four might be, it's still a Fantastic Four movie. I own the Roger Corman 1993 $1mil budget Fantastic Four and it was such shit, but I love it. It's a Fantastic Four movie! The whole time I watched The Hulk I couldn't believe I was watching the Hulk. After I was a little let down by Daredevil I still couldn't believe that I'd just seen Daredevil. I don't know what it is with me and these movies, but the idea of them, not the execution, THE IDEA of them thrills me.

I think I like this one better

Wicked!, originally uploaded by PinthGarnell.

God Sez, Happy Fourth of July

Super Wicked!, originally uploaded by PinthGarnell.

Sorry fair reader for not only a lapse in my blog, but I went home for the 4th, and snapped this kickass photo of a storm in the distance while all around fireworks went off. Kentuckians love their fireworks, any opportunity to mix Patriotism with shit blowing up is destined to be a big hit in the red states. And to help out all the fireworks have patriotic names, like Li'l Patriot, and Arab Massacre (with report).